to say that strange things happen to me would be an under statement, you'll come to understand that more with time when i start sharing the strange tales of my life but for now i want to share with you some things that were said between me and the boys i met in the airport and the ones i sat next to on the plane. enjoy.
"i don't want to do jager shots with you, i'm about to get on a plane.
don't be a baby, just do it.
are you peer presurring me?
so what if i am? are you gonna take the shot or not?
"did you just reach down there to touch my leg?
too bad I didn't shave before this flight."
" oh you're going to Miami with your girls? i bet you guys are going to party and hook-up.
no, they all have boyfriends.
you're the only one without a boyfriend?
yup, I bet I was the only one who brought condoms too.
oh, that doesn't mean anything, they sell condoms all over South Beach, that's what keeps the economy stable; well that, suntan lotion and those machines that put diamonds on everything."
"you didn't meet anyone in south beach?
i think you did it wrong?
miami. whenever i go there i bang at least 2 chicks.
haha. i'm trying to stay celibate.
oh, i guess that explains why your iPod just went from let's get it on by marvin gaye to some song named quickie."
"did you just have find your love by drake on repeat?
yah, so what?
apparently you're not cool enough to know that he's wack now.
what? drake is wack now? fuck, no one cc'd me on the memo. great, now i have to make a new mixtape. do you know how long I had to listen to the radio before that song came on?"